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This post is dedicated to someone I’m going to call “The Jumper”.

When I was on my way home from work last night, I was minding my own business and singing loudly to the radio. In other words, the usual. But when I got on a side street that is also an entrance to my local university, I was tailgated and then passed by a man in a late model black Buick.

At first I was annoyed that he switched lanes while passing within maybe an inch of my bumper, but it was late so I turned my music up and sang a little louder. After riding the guy in the left hand lane, he dove back into my lane in front of me (again with an inch to spare). At that time, we were also hitting a red light, so that made me have to slam on my brakes. Thanks again dude.

So naturally I’m more annoyed now, but apparently not as annoyed as the driver in front of me. The dude completely lost his shit. He started waving his arms, tossing his dreadlocks, and then he started jumping up and down in his car. His car bounced precariously and tilted at an odd angle, leading me to believe that the man behind the wheel was rather large. I witnessed this spontaneous tantrum and decided that it would be best to keep my distance.

When the light changed, the driver careened into the university entrance, bouncing all the way. Hopefully he was late for a test, otherwise…

DAFUQ?

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