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2013 Conference Highlights:

1. Couple having sex in the bushes

2. Room next door busting in at 1:30 AM screaming about flowers

3. $25 dollar hamburgers (on the children’s menu), plus $3 delivery fee and 33% gratuity

4. Drinks on drinks on drinks (as long as you have raffle tickets)

5. The Harlem Shake

6. Getting rejected by a bouncer

I’d like to remind you that this was a job and training conference, not a bachelorette party. And guess what guys? It was awesome.

Now that I’ve got you hooked, I’ll tell you the stories from my awesome weekend separated into sections that you will most likely find extremely boring or hilarious.

The conference this year was less than a couple hours away from our office at a 5 star hotel. Apparently every year the provider network throws all of us offices together and trains us. The classes were fantastic. A lot of big names came in and spoke to us about billing and coding, management, software and new technology, charities, customer service, and changes in the industry.

Boring Stuff


The classes for the first day were a little bit intense because they covered changing legislation, falling reimbursement levels, and changes in auditing frequency. Auditing was terrifying to say the least because audits are going up as the government is trying to cut down on Medicare expenses. Fraudulent billing is a real thing and so is screwing with the claim lines and jacking up charges before sending claims to insurance companies. In normal people talk, basically some people lie and say they performed services on patients that they didn’t, just to get more money back. The government is broke already, so they tasked the Office of the Inspector General with auditing any office they want. If everything is not meticulously documented in the patient’s record and supported by additional documentation, they will find things wrong. They then take their findings, convert it to a percentage, and multiply that by the office’s entire patient base. Then they ask for their money back for however many years they want. We are talking millions of dollars in fines here and a lot of red tape. It’s scary even though my office has a whole room of experienced, trained, and extremely knowledgeable billers.

The second day was about everything else. A lot of reps came and spoke about various products, then there was a lecture on management. If you’ve been with me for a while you know I love my job and both of my bosses. So they of course didn’t need that class.  The following lecture on social media was interesting because WordPress was mentioned (represent!). Finally, there was a lot of information on treating rare and advanced diseases with new technologies. The new tech was basically scanners and things that can measure about 50 measurements at once or something to that effect. All I know for sure is that the reports look detailed and organized, and all issues are highlighted in red.

What you really wanted to read…

So the food was awesome. They gave us delicious jumbo pretzels for snack, along with fruit and soda. For dinner the first night we had prime rib, roast turkey, risotto in truffle oil, and italian ice. There were also a lot of drinks had by all because they gave us raffle tickets. Those with tickets got 1 drink per ticket. Seeing as I’m under-aged and hate the taste of alcohol, I got a bottle of water and tossed my tickets down the line. The second day they gave us sliced apples, peanut butter, and M&M’s and for lunch we got a grilled chicken salad with mini key lime pies.

After classes were finished the first day, my room decided that the pool sounded pretty fabulous, but the other room decided that they wanted to take a water taxi and go to an up-scale bar in town. I was torn but decided with one of my roommates to go to the bar, hang out for a bit, and then go to the pool. So we all got dressed up and pretty, I broke out my stripper heels (ladies, you know what I’m talking about), and we walked down to the water taxi. We motored over and walked to the bar where the bouncer and doorman requested us to all present our ID’s. Damn. They would not be having any of my 20ishness that evening. So I laughed and bid them adieu and went back to the water taxi.

On the ride back over, I was watching fireworks when I overheard other passengers yelling “Yeah, you get it man!” “WOOOO!!!” I looked over and saw two people in the bushes engaged in coitus. The driver beeped the horn while I turned crimson in horror and diverted my attentions to occupying the two children sitting in front of me until the danger had passed. I mean, eww. Seriously. Eww. I texted my boss and informed her of the wonderousness they had just missed.

We got changed for the pool and spent about a half hour floating around before the attendants kicked us out. We walked to one of the cafe’s overlooking the bay and the girls got a beer. Stace and I walked back up to the room and got dressed for bed before we tucked in to our books. The other girls made it back a while after and we watched some TV. Court got hungry, so she ordered something from room service. The bad part is that room service is ridiculously pricey and charged $25 for a hamburger, plus a $3 delivery fee, plus a 33% gratuity on the whole amount. And it took 45 minutes to deliver. After she got it and ate it, we all fell asleep. Then, I hear my name being screamed by multiple people. I woke up swearing to find the next room had just gotten back. Not only that, but they had snapped up the flowers from all the room service trays and brought them to us. The bad part? It was freaking 1:30 and I thought the whole place was on fire. After they laughed and had their fill, they left and it took me a hella long time to go to bed again.

The wake up call went off at 6:30 but I slept until 7:30. I made it down to the conference room at 8 to find that I was supposed to bring all my luggage with me. So then I had to go back and get it, but the social media lecture made up for my annoyance. A doctor who was presenting the lecture encouraged the offices to get a bit crazy with youtube to get patients engaged in the practice. His office made a video of themselves doing something called the “Harlem Shake” which I can only describe as someone convulsing. It was amusing to say the least, but it is not something I think our office should ever partake in. I do not convulse to bad dubstep.

No sir.

No ma’am.