Before I get into this post, I’m going to put a little disclaimer. I wrote what I know here and the content is solely from my own personal experiences, hence why the view is intentionally narrow. It is not meant to offend anyone but to address a problem that I’m noticing and dealing with. Please feel free to comment and discuss, but do understand that this can be a controversial issue.
As much as I would like to start dating again, I’m terrified. I was going to say afraid, but terrified is a better choice. The thing is that I am not quite sure if my heart is intact enough to attempt anything but I also must overcome the host of shitty experiences I’ve seen go down.
My own personal shit aside, I’ve seen enough other people in my generation get royally screwed. It seems to me that horrible experiences while dating are very much the norm. I don’t know if that is because my generation is still immature or if we’ve just degenerated enough that even the most basic social respects have been tossed aside… Either way, dating in my mind goes a lot like this:
Women – Can be demanding heartless bitches with no respect for anyone or anything besides themselves. They whinge and whine about how they can’t find a good man and then they treat said decent men like shit. I notice this primarily in two groups: the top and the bottom tier. The supermodel, popular, mean girl types will always play nice as long as they get what they want. On the other hand, the whores of society are so full of their own issues they can’t hope to ever maintain a stable relationship. Most medium tier girls are overlooked in favor of either the top or the bottom because they are “okay” but they aren’t sex crazed and they aren’t super hot. Well, Ms. Beauty Queen eats genuine feelings for breakfast and Ms. Wanton wouldn’t know genuine feelings if they hit her in the face. But for some reason they are especially alluring and I don’t know why, but I’m a embittered and jaded woman, not a man.
Bottom line: These girls are always the first dating preference and they screw up men. A lot. A lot of men in my generation aren’t especially looking to settle into comfortable, stable, long term relationships so they don’t look at some girl and think “She will want plastic surgery in 10 years, not a family…” or “Would I really want her to be the mother of my children?” or even “Will she bring shame and dishonor on me and everything I love?”. And then when things go horribly with the top and the bottom tier, men just throw up their hands and say that there aren’t any good women left. And the bitchy women don’t even care, they just move on to the next guy.
Men – Aren’t focusing on school and jobs like they did in past generations. To be honest, the people I grew up with are often super super super seniors in college and don’t take things seriously. I feel like young men don’t understand or want to acknowledge the fact that the world isn’t an endless party filled with video games and casual sex.
I’ve seen so many promising men decide one day that they want to act like highschoolers again and just like that… drinking games take priority over everything. Again, I’m butter and jaded. But guys can be irresponsible and most of that is by choice. Some are more interested in hot girls to show off to their friends or getting laid and they don’t take anything seriously at all (besides how many likes on Facebook they get). If all of their friends have girlfriends sometimes they pick up a girlfriend just to keep pace knowing full well that she is just there to pass the time and cook. Nothing more. After all that, women get frustrated and wonder why the hell guys can’t start acting their age and not expecting women to be playthings or their mothers. Or in my case, just give up.
So I’m worried about dating because a lot of other people in my generation make it a joke. And I’m terrified of getting hurt again because finding a nice guy (or girl) is like finding a unicorn. I’m just not enthused and the challenge is just… too damn much if you really stop to think about it. But I’m thinking that the smart guys and girls live like social recluses, preferring the company of their own girl/guy friends and their families to dealing with this crap. And I can’t say I blame them.