Well, the thing with Mike is over. He friend zoned me and I decided that I just can’t handle it.
I mean, everything was going so well and then he freaked out. He tried to blame it on me when we met up last weekend and it was just a confusing nightmare. He thinks that relationships should just “happen” and should not require effort. (That sound you just heard was my hand slamming into my face.) I’m just pissed off, let down, and frustrated. And hurt. Really, really hurt.
I hate getting dismissed as a person by someone who didn’t even take the time to get to know me. Especially when everything was going so well and when we had so much in common. Dating is hard enough already, I don’t think people should make it any harder than it is. He doesn’t even realize that he did anything wrong. That’s what really gets me. He wants to be friends first until he figures out if he wants to further the relationship. Evidently, this means dropping off the face of the Earth for days at a time and contacting me when everything is on his terms.
After talking it over with the family, I made a decision today to join eHarmony. Is this what giving up feels like? I’m ready for a relationship, every other avenue has failed, and I can’t seem to find any men of good quality. I already have creepers that won’t leave me alone, why not try creepers from the internet that I can block?
I’m nervous, but I’ve already gotten messages, views, and questions sent to me. Plus, I don’t feel so angry about the whole thing. I know people that have met each other online and who went on the have very successful and happy marriages. It’s not like I’m out anything, right?
Online dating just feels weird though. Maybe I need some time to get accustomed to it.